Anger Is Deadly
I’m sure by now you’ve heard how bad it is to be angry. Your physical health suffers from the onrush of cortisol and the myriad of body systems this can affect. For the purposes of this article, I want to look at how it negatively affects your mindset, productivity and ultimate happiness. Then, I want to give you some quick tips to help you defuse anger in your life that give you the best chance of daily success towards your goals.
How Anger Affects Our Mindset
Anger is a complex emotion. While most of us see the physical side of yelling, violence and irrational behavior, these are just the external representations of anger.
In truth, anger can actually be used as a “substitute” emotion that is covering up for other deeply rooted emotions such as:
- Anxiety
- Resentment
- Guilt
In each of these cases, our brains would rather get into an angered state than admit the underlying emotions behind them. Obviously, dealing with these issues is beyond the scope of this article. However, I did want you to understand that just because anger has outward physical signs, that doesn’t mean it’s only a topical emotion. There can be other reasons for the anger the person is not even aware of. That’s one of the reasons I believe in talking to a mental health professional you trust whenever you experience emotions you don’t understand or can’t function with.
How I Defuse Anger
Believe it or not, it is actually quite common for people to get way into anger before they even realize they are heading that way. Anger is a powerful emotion and can disguise itself as a pursuit of excellence (getting stuck in a loop when you’re unable to accomplish a simple task like logging into a website) and can fool you into thinking you’re doing the right thing.
In my case, I’ve found that the ramp up from disappointed to miffed to pissed can come very quickly IF I ignore the signs. That’s why I believe the most proactive approach you can have to anger is to pay attention to yourself and NOT external factors. Nearly every time I’ve gotten really angry about something I could have stopped it by asking myself a simple question:
“How am I feeling right now?”
If I’m honest with myself, I’ll know I’m angry WAY before I get to pissed. Does that make sense? I know it’s not easy to remember asking yourself questions when you start down that road. However, it’s vital that you start building that habit.
Some Quick Tips To Defuse Anger
- If at all possible, remove yourself from the situation – Whether it just means, closing down the app that’s making you angry or physically leaving the space you’re in, do something to interrupt that response.
- Take some time to breathe, meditate or walk – Again, interrupting the cycle that has begun is crucial for avoiding an anger spiral. Plus, breathing and exercise both help lower those ramping cortisol levels!
- Forgive yourself for getting angry – Anger is a very common human emotion and beating ourselves up about getting angry is the pinnacle of counterproductivity. Last you checked, you WERE human, right? Allow yourself human tendencies and know just seeing them will help you not give in to them as easily next time.
- Make sure you’re taking care of your nutrition, sleep and social needs – A great whole foods diet, a regular bedtime and connecting with those that are important to you (hopefully, not angry people-LOL!) lay a solid foundation for defusing anger before it can begin.
How Do You Deal With Anger?
I’d love to hear any strategies you’ve used to keep you from that screaming insane person frame of mind. Leave me a comment below and let me hear about it. Sharing your experiences could be just the thing somebody else needs today. Also, if you enjoyed this article please share it on social media using the buttons below.
Until next time,
Jeff
Resources
How To Defuse Anger in Ourselves and Others – World of Psychology
Guide to Defusing Anger – Mindful
5 Steps to Defusing Anger – Always Well Within
Dealing with Angry People – Mindtools